Wednesday, June 3, 2009

"shes going to hate her curls when shes older..."

everyone loves to see a child with curls, so its no wonder everytime i am out with the munchkin someone compliments her ringlets. more often than not, it goes like this:

"oh i love her hair! she has the most beautiful curls. too bad she'll hate them when shes older..."

there is a 50/50 chance the person will follow it up with:

"people with curls always want straight hair and straight haired people always want curls."

i do get where theyre coming from when they add in the second part. it seems like the philosophy of the grass is always greener on the other side is just a part of human nature. but it always makes me wonder. granted, its always a straight haired person who says it, so maybe they too are a slave to their flat iron or know someone who is. but i cant help wonder why they would say that to me, a curly adult. obviously, i dont hate my hair if im sporting my kinks in their full glory. sometimes i do tell the person that i doubt that she'll hate her hair since both her dad and i are proud curlies.

i know the comment in itself is very innocent and those who tell me dont mean any harm at all. but the more i hear it/think about it, i realize how powerful my role is as a parent. its up to us (her dad and me), as well as my extended family to let her know that her hair is beautiful and that there is no reason to wish she had something else. for anyone reading this who knows a young curly, please do everything in your power to let them know just how wonderfully perfect their curls, kinks, and frizzy fuzzies are.

1 comment:

Renata said...

I haven't heard that yet about my daughter, but I used to say the same thing about straight-haired wanting curls, etc (but it was usually to someone who was mentioning how they wished they had straight hair). After two perms, I realized that God gave me that hair and I started liking it as it was. So I think the acceptance about it can go either way, and I'm glad you are conscious of nurturing that with your daughter.
I am thrilled, however, that my daughter has curls, but just tonight I found out how to properly care for them (she's almost 3).